Greentext Does: Ikusa Megami Zero

You know what was a good game? Kamadori Alchemy Meister. Damn good actually. So good in fact that I wanted to play another game by the same dev. Unfortunately none of their latest stuff is translated. Fortunately I had heard hushed whispers of a dark fragment of technology so potent it could rend the very fabric of time and space to make the Japanese language comprehensible to human beings. VnReader. Unfortunately, after spending 3 hours trying to get VNreader to automatically translate Eushully’s latest game I decided that dealing with failure would be easier than trying to get the program to stop translating into Russian for the 18th time. So, I did some digging and it turns out that one of their earlier games has a full fan translation. Let’s just play this instead.

The game begins in a ruined castle with you, the hero protagonist who you know he’s a hero because he tries to reason with non sentient rape squid monsters and has a goal of “making literally everyone always happy forever”, pursing some missing women. With you is your trusty sidekick, short haired tsundere priestess sister, who you know is your sister because she insists on referring to herself as “Your big sister”. And finally bringing up the rear you have your good friend, brash blonde, built like a truck sword dude who you know is brash because he wields 2 swords and only brash and reckless trouble makers wield 2 swords.

You and your motley crew kill a fish monster, kill a water dragon, find out the women were all fish raped before you could get there, and escape the ruined castle as it collapses into an even more ruined castle. I mean at this point it’s more of a large pile of masonry chunks than a ruined castle but I digress. When you get back to town the local high priest congratulates you on how good of a job you did not rescuing those girls in time and promotes you to “Kind of a big deal”. He then tells you your new special mission. “Our rock that looks like a vagina holy relic is tainted by hella evil and we need you to find a way to purify it”. Cool. Mission accepted. Meet up with a redhead mage, find out that your sister doesn’t like to wear clothes when it’s hot, and head out of town into your big adventure.

Now, how does it play? Well it’s like if you took the overworld system from Alchemy Meister (minus the crafting), the grid based combat from Bunny Black, and the real time/ turn based combat system from Grandia. Let me explain that in more detail. In your overworld you have your map. You have dungeons you can check out and a couple towns to visit. The towns have stores that sell mostly consumable items with the addition of a couple lame weapons. The starting town has a church that can sell healing items and remove curses and an arena where you can do fights for money. So far it’s pretty similar to Alchemy Meister. This game, however, does not have any form of crafting or shop running mechanics which makes sense seeing as it’s an earlier title.

Once you enter a dungeon the game shifts into an isometric perspective and you control Selika. The dungeons aren’t grid based like Rance VI but instead you can move however you want with the mouse. Dungeons are basically big mazes with random encounters, points to fully heal you, chests with items, and occasional teleporters and lever puzzles. You can escape dungeons at any time using your coward amulet so going deeper is never a big risk. You can also use those heal points as much as you want so hanging out next to one and grinding encounters is easy. The design of the dungeons is lacking. They’re pretty much just hedge mazes with different skins.

The combat is where things get interesting. I don’t know if I can call it turn based or real time because it’s honestly neither. You have characters on a grid with attacks that target certain tiles on the other side’s grid. You do get to choose an attack whenever your character’s turn comes up but when you do they don’t instantly attack. See those bars in the bottom intersected by the line? They count the amount of time each attack takes. You can put more power into your special moves to do more damage at the cost of taking longer and requiring more mana.

Killing monsters nets your party EXP which you can spend to level up Selika’s different stats. Your other party members get it too but they just get periodic level ups with no micromanagement required. Unfortunately you can’t pump your stats however you like. Each stat has an upper limit determined by your other stats. No matter how busted and lopsided you actually want to make your stats it will always stay pretty balanced. I can understand why this is done (Hint: End users are stupid) but it would be nice to be able to make Selika into a OP lightning mage if I wanted to.

Obviously next up is the porn. Well, as is often the case in these games, there isn’t much of it. Luckily Eushully made the decision to start the game off with some smut right away and then space it out evenly as the game progresses. This is in stark contrast to Alchemy Meister where there’s no porn for the first 8 hours and then it just starts throwing tons of it at you. The porn quality seems alright. All the female characters have voice acting and there’s a decent amount of different cgs for each scene. The game also features a gallery and scene replay system which can be accessed through the title screen.

Now. Here we have to delve into spoiler territory but I feel this has to be adressed as it could seriously impact your enjoyment of the game. It doesn’t come into play until about 11 hours into the game so if you’d like to play that before than go ahead. The game can be downloaded here.

Are you ready?

11 hours into the game you permanently turn into a tranny goddess.

Surprise!! I hope you like new kinks because now you’re a trap. Yep, this is permanent, happens for the rest of the game, and you keep playing as this trap for the other games in the series. Remember that love interest? You’re her now. But with a penis. There was absolutely 0 indication this would happen. Certain events happened in which it seemed like my character died. I woke up in the middle of a male on female sex scene. I accidentally open up the character menu and notice that my portrait is of that woman for some reason. Then I realize it. I can’t see much of my character’s body in the sex scene. Just the penis. Then the camera pans out and BOOM. I’m a trap. Yeah so that’s a thing.

The game is fun but it has massive issues with changing tones and kinks, the biggest of which is the switch to tranny porn. In the 11 hours leading up to it I had a lot of fun. Selkia’s decisions could be frustrating at times but I ended up liking him more than I thought I would. If you’re willing to enjoy a story but stop before it’s fully concluded than I think you should give Ikusa Megami a try. If you’re into tranny porn than DEFINITELY give it a try.

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